"You will do foolish things but do them with enthusiam" - Colette

Reference department, how can I help you?

"I need . . . a computer, to know from whom the US bought Alaska, the 2008 budget of the US Dept of Education, help using my Bissell vacuum, to know why I was kicked out and treated like a g-d criminal"; these are some of the questions I answered yesterday. I am most definitely not in YPL anymore. And surprisingly I miss it. That was not anticipated, since I have historically hated kids my entire life, even when I was one. But miss it I do and that is why I am so pleased that this reference position is only temporary. This is not a fact my supervisor is aware of just yet. I had to drive to Barstow on Monday to have my fingerprints taken for the required background check, a trip involving the Mad Greek, blasting tests at the military base, and waiting for the bail bonds lady to show up at the office. Barstow: always a treat. Now I just have to wait until all the paperwork arrives in the new district's HR office to get a start date and I am GONE.

I am getting teary-eyed at the prospect of leaving my loved ones in Vegas. Jane and Zelda have become so intrinsic that I can't imagine not being able to drag them to an all-night dinner for crisis consultation. A wonderful and once very close friend whom I shall refer to as "Tink" just moved back here and I am dismayed at not being able to resume our relationship. And who will have Mumbai Mondays with me? My Bollywood friend and I collaborated on a fantasy roller-derby team called the "Bindi Bruisers" and chose the names "Aishwarya Slay" (me) and "Rani Make-'em-flee" (her). For those not obsessed with India, those names are based on the popular actresses Aishwarya Rai and Rani Mukherjee. I was also thinking "Suttee Widow" would be a great name, especially if she painted flames on her skates. This idea is developing into a programming idea for my new library as well but more on that later. Now I call for comments; what would your roller-derby name be? Check out any number of teams' websites to get a feel for it or the YA book by Cross called "Derby Girl".

In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different. - Coco Chanel

If little else, the brain is an educational toy. - Tom Robbins

"How I love libraries, any and all libraries, those sanctuaries for the maimed and undanceable, the lowly, pimply, neurotic, overweight, underweight, myopic, asthmatic . . . Few are the flirtations in a library. Few are the assaults, physical or verbal. Libraries exist for people like me."
- Joyce Carol Oates, Expensive People

Today is my first day as a "librarian". I breezed past the breakroom, not needing to swipe my card and fairly danced toward my desk. I remain in my current library for 2 weeks but my position and pay change today. This will sustain me through my "I Sing the Body Electric" program today, where I will hand out saltines and explain the digestive process, we will breathe deeply and explain the respiration process, I will lead the patrons in a simple yoga series and try to understand what it means to fully inhabit one's body. Trying to do yoga with our jaded and thuggish little patrons? Not my brightest choice but perhaps it will succeed. I am in an anticipatory state, refining my program plans for the upcoming interview. Stargirl and Pigeons Finds a Hot Dog are my selected texts for use. Mo Willem's is a proven success with children, I read that book in my nephew's classroom to great acclaim and hope that positivity will carry over to my interview. And I have adored Stargirl since I first opened it, know it inside and out, and hope that comfort level will enable me to speak cogently and present my ideas well.

I like the loner's view of libraries presented by the narrator in Joyce Carol Oates' Expensive People, library as sanctuary for the unacceptable. I have grown up in libraries, remember checking out stacks of books up to my chin, arms extended and aching. I have always slept surrounded by shelves and shelves of books, find solace in running my eyes over them, rearranging them by subject or theoretical LC call number. (I am not yet far gone enough to have actually cataloged my home library) I bring home great stacks of materials, create extended reading lists, systematically work my way through the piles, assimilating and digesting materials from fiction and nonfiction alike. Books take me out of myself and return me improved. Reading is my joy and my solace and I am so lucky to have finally become a librarian, less than a week before my 28th birthday. Now on to more sobering personal matters.

"Only when the honey turns to dust are you free" - Rebecca Solnit, Field Guide to Getting Lost

This is a perfect summation of my current requirements, I am trying to let the honey that coats my heart turn to dust so that one of my many sighs might puff away the residue of adoration and pain. And so to will the sighs fade away, my eyes clear our the glamour that has entranced me. I likened my current state of sensation to the original "Little Mermaid" story, where she felt as though each step she took was on razor sharp knives. I feel as though each beat of my heart drives a thousand billion (the same number as cells in a human body) tiny spikes deeply into the muscle. But only when I remember her. The trick is to escape and let the honey become dust so that the memories will just be sweet and part of my arsenal of experiences. Until then, I will drown myself in books and experiences. Today's attempt? Sew Subversive, a book on creating one's own fabulous wardrobe though my talent in the domestic arts is restrained solely to the cleaning sphere. Cooking and sewing are nearly hopeless pursuits. I will keep trying though . . .

Intriguing fact from Harper's Index in October of 1989: Estimated amount of glucose used by an adult human brain each day, expressed in M&Ms: 250

Check out some of my new favorite online comics: Girls with Slingshots!, Eat Your Lipstick, Kawaii Not.

"The idea of waiting for something makes it more exciting" - Andy Warhol

I am channeling the pain of my pinata-smashed heart into work-relate productivity. I just developed a Stargirl book talk for teens that will be part of my interview process for my ideal job. I can't wait for mid-September. Now I am designing a body program for school-aged children that will provide a simple yoga workout at the end. This is part of my grand plan to get kids away from the computers and at least get their blood moving for 15 minutes or so. We'll see how successful the program is. Now I'm faced with the task of designing a yoga workout for children that is simple to follow but keeps their interest. Hmm. Since I have been practicing yoga (along with pilates, bellydance, Bollywood dance and myriad other types of fitness) for at least 5 years now, I should be able to do this successfully, right?

And in the realm of Bollywood, I enjoyed another "Mumbai Monday" with my like-minded friend when we watched "Kuch Kuch Hota Hai". Which brings the total of Hindi phrases I know to 3: "pain of disco", "my love", and "something is happening". R Batty supports my linguistic endeavors though questions the usefulness of my phrases. Enough chatter, more yoga.

"Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body" - Sir Richard Steele

When they have eyes for me, it's like Heaven. - Ginsberg

There is another celestially-relevant quote from the Beats; Gregory Corso said "I'd reached Heaven and it was syrupy. It was oppressively sweet." I imagine he is correct and Nietzsche said “In heaven all the interesting people are missing” which basically cements my preference, should I indeed find there is an afterlife. Hell, however, may be found in Staff Day for the LVCCLD. All of the library district’s employees are dragged to a casino and forced to endure hours of monotonous and inane lecturing from a series of irrelevant speakers. The one bright spot in the day was a futurist speaker who discussed innovations in the Internet and other devices, like the Pleo Dinosaur and iGoogle. I am now completely obsessed with creating a perfect iGoogle page which includes a daily literary quote, CNN.com, weather, moon phases, art of the day, NY Times crossword, MapQuest directions, mini-Amazon, an iTunes feed, movie times for my zip code, my email inbox and a translation box. And all of that is just on the home page, I have separate news and art pages. Then there is, of course, the background choices, including artists like Agatha Ruiz de la Prada. I am completely enamored with iGoogle. I was for so very long avoiding all sorts of technology with a fanatical passion but taking this class has flung me forward into exploring all types of Internet applications. I didn’t have a cell phone until 2004. I still don’t have television and probably never will. The combination of the class and the speaker at Staff Day has ignited my enthusiasm for Web exploration and constructing things to my taste.

No television does not equal no movies though. I watched “Desk Set” last night and fell absolutely in love with Hepburn’s brilliant reference librarian, Bunny. The scene on the roof where Spencer Tracey’s character interviews her is priceless and an excellent example of the incredible value of a librarian’s brain. “Party Girl” is another favorite librarian movie and Parker Posey makes an incredible conversion to the marvels of cataloging in an absolutely charming series of events. I watched the “Librarian” parts 1 & 2 with Noah Wyle but was not all that impressed. Any suggestions for good library movies? Post a comment.

I spent my day off yesterday removing every book on my shelves, dusting the shelves, and reorganizing the books in a new order. My arranging is similar to the LC categories but I have yet to actually generate Cutter numbers for them. There may come a point when that happens, perhaps after I graduate and have more free time. Alarming, really.

“The wild nerves of your poems will translate straight into my tongue” – D.M. Thomas

open your lovely twilight eyes very wide - Paul Eluard to Gala

There is a prevailing stereotype regarding librarians: frumpy women with glasses, buns, and a shushing frown plastered across their wrinkled faces. Look at the photos from an ALA conference and this will seem to be entirely accurate. I love this stereotype because it allows me to break it, to be a rockstar librarian. My boss likes to send me to do our school outreach because I have red hair, tattoos, and I’m under 30. So when I enter a classroom and ask who knows where I am visiting from, the students rarely know the answer. I did get one girl who guessed I was a doctor which I found both strange and flattering. I do wear glasses (after online MLIS work for nearly 2 years), I often wear my hair in a French twist, and I have a penchant for librarian cardigans. I also love to bellydance, have danced on stage with Iggy Pop (at last year’s Vegoose music festival where Jane and I had artist-access wristbands and got tons of free stuff and hung out with Flava Flav and Chuck D, among others), enjoy cheering on the Sin City Rollergirls at their derby bouts, and love to go to offbeat places like the outdoor sculpture museum at Rhyolite or to the Amargosa Opera House. (Look those last two up, you’ll be glad you did.) All of these aspects of my life are integrated and not exclusive. Maybe next time you visit your local library’s reference desk, you should give the librarian an extra glance to see if you recognize her from somewhere else.


"Hey you, just keep on dancing". This quote from the incredible Austin duo Ghostland Observatory was written by Jane on a picture of Mikhail Baryshnikov and hung on our refrigerator and it never fails to make me smile.

“I wanted change and excitement and to shoot off in all directions myself, like the colored arrows from a Fourth of July rocket” – Sylvia Plath

Punk jokes are hilarious to very few (but I'm one of the few!)

Q: What has 8 arms and kills its girlfriend? A: Squid Vicious. Ha!
Q: How many Rudeboys does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 4. One to drop it and 3 to "pick it up! pick it up! pick it up!"

Okay, enough. I am in a quandary regarding my upcoming story time. Our library district is, for the first time, celebrating GLBT Pride month. This is incredibly excited and I am delighted to have been on the committee to ensure its’ occurrence. However, I have already heard complaints from others in the library district that I will be pushing a homosexual agenda on unsuspecting children. This is wrong for many reasons but I shall list 1) there is NO agenda that homosexuals have to trap any unsuspecting heterosexuals in some sort of weird deprogramming ritual, 2) the kids who attend the program will most likely be the children of gay parents and therefore are already WELL AWARE of homosexuality, 3) it is a district-wide recognition of gay pride! I will not create a trajectory rant on gay rights or any other social or political issue in this blog but I feel that is relevant to my experiences as a Sin City librarian.

Writing this blog reminds me of my first time in college at UCSD when I was so involved in the radio station (KSDT) and the associated “scene”. It was a very different experience than the ecampus program in which I am currently enrolled and I find I prefer the latter. San Diego taught me I hate surfers and quite enjoy artists (but I had my suspicions in that regard anyhow). I had a pink Mohawk and piercing though I grew out of both. I also picked up a lot of fabulous new bands and music knowledge that has served me well (like at the eviction party the Locust threw). I am grateful for the experience and pleased that it is behind me. This segues nicely into my musical therapy theory – music can always change your mood. Songs that will always make me happy, no matter how behind the couch I feel (ask Jane about “behind the couch”): Madness’ “One Step Beyond” (this is also to be played at Jane’s funeral, it’s a pact we have), Erasure’s “Oh l’Amour”, Madonna’s “Hung Up” (how to make ABBA and Madonna gayer? Mix them together!), the theme from the Bollywood movie Dhoom 2 “Dhoom Again”, the Stooges’ “I Wanna Be Your Dog”, the Specials “Monkey Man”, and anything from the Misfits (only with Danzig singing). Post a comment, what’s your happy song?

- BiblioFemme

"Until you've lost your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was" - Margaret Mitchell

"I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it" - the divine Mae West

S-T-A-U-N-C-H

"I tell you if there's anything worse than dealing with a staunch woman... S-T-A-U-N-C-H. There's nothing worse, I'm telling you. They don't weaken, no matter what." - "Little Edie" Bouvier Beale in Grey Gardens

Required by a class in my final semester of my MLIS program at UNT, I have begun a blog about being a Young People's Librarian in Sin City. Rising like a phoenix from the smoking wreckage of my past, I am curious to create this outlet and see how the experience will develop. My truths? I am very nearly (see me August 8, 2008) a librarian. I am a voracious reader. I am gay and an enthusiast of roller derby, burlesque, and bellydancing. I have a lot of tattoos including several designed from comics by R. Crumb and George Herriman. I share my house with 4 cats: Allen Ginsberg, Charles Bukowski, Zzyzx, and Icarus. And I have 2 fabulous roommates whom I shall henceforth refer to by their imposed pseudonyms: Jane (for Jane Birkin) and Zelda (for the name Marilyn Monroe used when checking in to hotels). The following is a quote from Allen Ginsberg that seems appropriately updated by replacing the word "poetry" with "blog": "Poetry is the one place where people can speak their original human mind. It is the outlet for people to say in public what is known in private."

I am not a writer, beyond research papers, but rather a consumer of what is written. I like to collect quotations from myriad sources and save them in a journal. I have a color-coded planner that never leaves my side and my books are all sorted in a method similar to the Library of Congress cataloging. I am bossy and a know-it-all show-off; I am selfish and well-aware of my own shortcomings. I am just shy of becoming a crazy cat lady. That said, I am looking forward to the upcoming interactions with this blog.

- BiblioFemme